遠離渾身充滿負能量的朋友

2015/07/28 瀏覽次數:6 收藏
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  本日口譯文章:5大來由闊別滿身充斥負能量的同夥

  大多半人都最少有一個滿身披發負能量的“有毒”的同夥:只要他們前腳踏足,咱們的天下立時變得雜亂無章。咱們都曉得闊別如許的同夥,工作會變得加倍簡略,實在咱們已花了太多時光去思慮為何還要留在如許的同夥身旁。

  為何你有負能量的同夥

  現實上,有許多緣故原由:

  你們是發小。

  太懂得他們了,以是常常評判他們的行動。

  他們沒有其他可以乞助的工具,以是你會有負罪感。

  他們也是你男友/配頭/家庭成員,以是你認為有義務要陪著他們。

  假如你跟他們正面遭受,你很怕他們會有的反響(會更戲劇化)。

  與其損壞現有的生存方法,還不如和他們持續相處下去。

  平日情形下,這只是簡略的兩小我不搭的題目罷了。當初讓你認為是同夥的激動不復存在,大概是你倆的生存偏向判然不同。

  到底負能量同夥的標記是甚麽?

  我用的短語是“負能量同夥”,我的意思並非他們自己便是負能量的,究竟每小我都有權力去照著本身的設法主意來生存,但若他們給你生存釀成的影響使你落空了你想要的器械,你就須要留意了。

  假如你有同夥幹如下這些工作,你須要賣力的斟酌斟酌他們在你生存中的位置了。

  他們幫不上忙。

  你須要他們的時刻老是不在。

  只有在須要你的時刻他們才會湧現。

  他們讓你認為累。

  他們沒有野心。

  他們常常激憤你。

  當他們想幹甚麽的時刻,他們願望你能拋下統統。

  他們認為每件事都是急事。

  從那些心坎充斥豪情的人中進修進修吧:假如你想變得鋒利,你必需花時光和那些鋒利的人在一路。為了空出時光給這些人,照樣拋下負能量的同夥們吧。

  為何要闊別負能量的同夥

  這也不是那末簡略的一件事,然則想要過上本身想要的生存,闊別他們是必需的,不然:

  他們會耗光你全部的潛能

  我小我對付這種同夥最大的履歷便是,假如你歷久被他們沒必要要的戲劇化和龐雜性滋擾,你永久沒法施展本身最大的潛能。要想勝利,你須要一個果斷的線路和壯大的支撐系統。把那些負能量同夥踢出你的後備軍團吧,他們能做的只是滋擾你而已。

  他們會讓你認為很糟

  假如他們想你去做你不肯意做的工作,他們會一向纏著你,讓你有負罪感,認為你應當知足他們的需求。如許一來就會構成惡性輪回,無休無止。但若不闊別,你就做好各種襲擊自負的生理預備吧。

  他們會對你的名聲發生負面影響

  你被同夥說服陪TA去加入聚首(不去你會認為很忸怩),成為你懶惰同夥的手杖。你從上公立黌舍開端就一向妄想為其事情的幻想店主,早就在臉書裏看過你那些恐懼的照片了,而你卻對此一竅不通。

  不但如斯,假如這個易如反掌的就影響到你的小我生存,他們就會認為你沒法在專業的情況中應答自若。

  他們會讓你不自發展現最差的那一壁

  你想試圖改掉那些壞習氣?這些負能量同夥會讓你寸步難行,你沒法養成好的習氣,在重壓之下你終極就會廢棄。究竟,假如你變得更好,你和他們的幹系就會變得更差,這會妨害到他們應用你。

  他們會毀了你生存中的美妙事物

  你老是存眷他們的戲劇化生存、須要和設法主意,這類友誼的壓力會讓你沒法存眷本身正在變好的生存。簡略的說,悲觀帶來悲觀——你豈非真願望生存釀成如許麽?

  你還在等甚麽呢?把這種人撇除本身的生存圈,好好的和那些你樂意在一路的同夥們過上本身想過的生存。假如你如今還不做決議,那些負能量同夥就會上下你。

  【參考譯文】

  Most of us have at least one friend we consider toxic: the loser friend who disrupts our entire world the second they step into it. We know things would be so much easier if we cut them loose, yet we spend more time figuring out why we stay than it would take to actually leave.

  Why You Have Loser Friends

  The truth is, it happens for a multitude of reasons:

  You’ve been friends with them since you were kids.

  You know them so well you’re constantly justifying their behavior.

  You feel guilty because they don’t have anyone else to turn to.

  You feel obligated to spend time with them because they’re a mutual friend of your BFF/spouse/family member.

  You’re afraid of how they’ll react if you confront them (a.k.a. more drama).

  You feel it’s easier to deal with them than disrupt your lifestyle any further.

  Usually though, it’s a simple case of outgrowing each other. What caused you to “click” initially as friends no longer applies, or your lives are going in completely different directions.

  What Constitutes a Loser Friend?

  When I use the term “loser friend,” I don’t mean they themselves are losers—everyone is entitled to live their life exactly how they want to—but what they’re doing to your life is causing you to lose what you want… and you’re letting it happen.

  If you have friends who do any of the following, you need to seriously consider their place in your life:

  They’re not supportive.

  They’re not there when you need them.

  They’re only there when they need you.

  They make you feel drained.

  They have no ambition.

  They constantly infuriate you.

  They expect you to drop everything when they want to do something.

  They think everything is an urgent crisis.

  Take it from someone who watched her own life implode: if you want to be amazing, you have to spend your time with amazing people. In order to make room for these people, you have to leave your loser friends behind.

  Why You Should Leave Your Loser Friends Behind

  It’s not going to be easy, but letting them go is a necessary part of creating the life you’ve always wanted for yourself. Otherwise:

  1. They’ll hold you back from your full potential.

  The biggest thing I learned from my experience with friends like these is that you’ll never live up to your full potential if you’re constantly weighed down by unnecessary drama and complication. In order to succeed, you need a solid routine and a strong support system. Consider your loser friends the loose floorboard in that support system, constantly distracting you from your goals.

  2. They’ll make you feel like crap about yourself.

  When they want you to do something you don’t want to do, they’ll constantly nag you and make you feel guilty about being who you are until you cave to their demands. It’s an incessant, vicious cycle that won’t end until you put a stop to it. If you don’t, get ready for a wide array of self-esteem issues.

  3. They’ll negatively impact your reputation.

  You were guilted into going to that party and became your sloppy friend’s crutch, and the dream employer you’ve wanted to work with since you were in public school is going to know that when they’re checking out the horrific pictures you’re tagged in on Facebook.

  More than that, if you’re this easily influenced in your personal life, they’re going to assume you won’t be able to hack it in a professional setting.

  4. They’ll bring out the worst in you.

  You know all of those bad habits you’re trying to break? Your loser friends will make it so difficult for you to build good habits you’ll constantly crack under the pressure and eventually give up on the concept entirely. After all, if you change for the better, your relationship with them will change for the worse, and will work against what they need from you.

  5. They’ll dim the good things in your life.

  You’ll be so focused on their drama, needs, and wants, the stress of your friendship will cause you to lose focus on the aspects of your life that are going well. Simply put, negativity breeds negativity—is this really how you want your life to be?

  So what are you waiting for? Leave drama to the circus and live your life exactly how you want to, with who you want to. If you don’t decide to do so now, your loser friends will decide for you.